User blog:Gruvias/The Fishran Conquest
One day there was a boy named Kieran waiting for his mom to return home with food. It was sushi which he has thrown out because he hated it then he went to bed that night and suddenly ......... (An eerie green smoke appears while Kieran is sleeping. It's the wizard Xaveron or as he prefers to be called Xav) Xav: Kieran. Kieran. Kieran. Kieran: (Waking up) What the fuck? Are you some kind of wizard? Xav: Hush up. It is I the great and powerful Xaveron or as most people call me Xavvy. I am here because you threw away sushi. Fish aka my brethren. Kieran: So you came to me. At fucking 3 am because I threw away sushi. Sorry but I hate sushi. Now why are you here? Xav: Because I will put a curse on you. And you won't like it. Kieran: Yeh right. Xav: Suit yourself man. (Xav disappears) Kieran: I don't believe in curses. All I believe in is good luck. (The next day. Kieran is in a book store looking at types of mangas then he spots a girl out the window making him run out) Kieran: YAZZY! WAIT UP! Yazzy: Kieri. You seem extra happy today. Kieran: (In a cocky tone) Yeah well. Told myself last night today would be my lucky day. In this case ........ I'm in love with you. (Yazzy appears shocked) Yazzy: Huh? Kieran: Yeah but for good reason so ......... would you give me - - (Kieran stops talking as Yazzy takes his hands and they kiss) Yazzy: Guess your day got luckier. Tonight we go on our first date. (Yazzy walks away. Kieran starts pumping his fists then walks in the other direction as he spots a wallet and picks it up and walks up to a woman) '''Kieran:' Excuse me ma'am. Is this your wallet? Dani: Why yes it is. Thank you good sir. You know what you seem like a good kid. (Dani gives Kieran $50. Kieran thanks Dani as he takes the money from her and walks away) Kieran: First a girl, now money?! I'm so happy I could sing. (Singing) Oh happy days are here again. The skies above are clear again. So let's sing a song of cheer again happy days are here again. (Kieran walks into a store and starts trying out cologne then finds the right one and checks out) Rob: Did you find everything to your liking? Kieran: Yes I have good sir. I have a date tonight. Rob: Good luck then. Kieran: Thank you! And I have plenty of luck on my side today. (Later Kieran is at his house getting ready for his date. A green smoke surrounds him. He appears as a fish. He looks in the mirror and starts screaming) '''Kieran:' What the fuck happened to me?! CURSE YOU XAVERON!!!!!!!!! (Kieran arrives at Yazzy's. She gets shocked and hits him with her purse) Kieran: It's me Kieran!!!!! Yazzy: Fish don't fucking talk or walk! YOU'RE NOT KIERAN YOU CREEP! (Kieran is unimpressed as she closes the door. Time jump the next day Kieran is walking down the street) '''Lizzy:' HUNTER! STAY! Hunter: Lizzy there's a walking fish! (Lizzy slaps Hunter multiple times and scolds him) Lizzy: What the fuck? Stop lying to me Hunter. OMG KATIE! Katie: LIZZY BABY! (Katie and Lizzy give each other air kisses until Katie screams as she sees Kieran the walking fish) Lizzy: Katie why are you -- WHAT THE FUCK?! Kieran: Lizzy it's me. Kieran! Lizzy: Get away you weirdo fish! (Katie cowers in fear as Lizzy beats Kieran up a million times and finishes him off with pepper spray. He runs away Brandon appears with flowers) Hunter: Lizzy it's your boyfriend. (Lizzy sprays Hunter with pepper spray) Brandon: Hello Lizzy. Lizzy: Brandon promise you'll treat me like a queen and not take advantage of my love for you. Brandon: I'd never. (Lizzy turns away crossing her arms. Then sees the flowers and takes them from Brandon while blushing but also glaring. Brandon pinches Lizzy's cheeks) '''Brandon:' Lizzy you're so cute! Lizzy: Brandon what the fuck?! Get off! (Kieran approaches an apartment. It's where Red, CC and Alex live. He gets on a trampoline and sticks to the window. The 3 scream) Red: What the fuck is that a fish?! Alex: Don't be fucking ridiculous Red. Fish don't stick to windows. Or do they? (CC opens the window. Kieran falls in. Alex and Red hug each other and scream in fear) CC: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?! Kieran: It's me Kieran! CC: I don't believe you. Kieran: Alex. Red it's ME! Red: I wanna believe you but I can't. Alex: I do. (Kieran smiles until Alex starts laughing and laughs even harder when CC tugs at his head) Kieran: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! CC: Man the head on this thing is tight! Kieran: It's real. (Alex gets scared and kicks Kieran out. He flies into the next apartment being Cam and Tori's. Catie, Jo and Sarah are also over) Cam: What the fuck was that? Tori: I'm too scared to go see. Catie: Me too. Jo: I just don't wanna see. Sarah: Fine. I'll go. (Sarah checks all the rooms then sees Kieran in Tori's room and throws him out. He flies into Matt's apartment. Matt walks down the stairs and trips as he falls with Kieran) Kieran: Matt it's me! Matt: Kieran? How are you a fish? Kieran: A fucking sea wizard. Put a curse on me. Because I threw out sushi. Matt: Go down to a lake and see it you can summon that wizard. Kieran: That's fucking weird. Matt: Just fucking do it. (Kieran has a dejected sigh as he walks out) Kieran: Hi Ari. Annie. (Ari starts screaming like a girl as he jumps into Annie's arms) '''Annie: Eww walking fish. And it said my name. Ari: Get it away babe! GET. IT. AWAY! (Annie kicks Fish!Kieran far away to a lake. Xaveron appears) Xav: Hello again Fishran. Kieran: (In a sarcastic tone) Haha cause my name's Kieran and I'm a fish. CHANGE ME BACK! Everyone kicked me. Pepper sprayed me. And you ruined my date! Xav: Say you're sorry to that dead fish. Kieran: What?! Xav: If you don't say it then you'll be like this till you die. I know you won't fucking do it though since you're stubborn and have to much pride, confidence, too cocky and - - (Kieran looks at the dead fish) Kieran: I'm sorry fish. (Xav sighs as he waves his scaly wand and Kieran is back to a human. Xav disappears) '''Kieran:' YASSS! I'm back! (Yazzy squeals as she hugs Kieran) Yazzy Kieran. I've been so worried about you! Red: We all have. Lizzy: I wasn't. Hunter: Told you so Lizzy. (Lizzy glares and knees Hunter in the crotch) '''Cam:' There was this fucking creepy human fish hybrid going around town saying he was you. Matt: It was him. Kieran: Eh well. Sorry everyone. (Yazzy kisses Kieran until a fish pops in Kieran's arms flapping about) Yazzy: Ewww! Kieran: XAVERON! Oh Brandizzy ........... (Kieran tosses the fish to Brandon after he kisses Lizzy. Then he gets freaked and tosses it to Lizzy who tosses it to Ari and then chases Kieran around and pepper sprays him until Brandon is pinching Lizzy's cheeks again) '''Brandon:' My cute princess. Lizzy: BRANDON I SWEAR TO GOD........... IF YOU DON'T STOP! (Xav appears) Xav: And they all lived normally ever after in this dysfunctional type setting. At least I made Fishran a thing. Category:Blog posts